As I wait for the window of roleplaying opportunity to swing open again, inevitably my mind begins to wander onto other rpg opportunities and possibilities. One of my definite possibilities for the future is a system called 'Burning Wheel' - it's an indie system that seems to embody the exact balance that I seek in a system.
What do I mean by that?
Well, over the last couple of years, I have become aware that in some message boards around the internet there are people that debate and discuss roleplaying theory in a very academic fashion. I've dipped in and out, but I really have little patience for that sort of wasteful mental exercise, so I have no grand contribution. One thing it has raised in my consciousness is the need to match your players needs and desires in a game with your own. It's a bit like the theory of learning styles - you have the theorists, activists, pragmatists and reflectors - and to train someone you effectively you need to do something that appeals to their particular mix of styles and predelictions. It's complex.
One of the things that has become apparent in our group is that we are less interested (as a group) in the technical aspects of the games we play and more interested in the stories that we are telling as part of the game. Thats very cool - it breaks down the traditional roles of GM and player and makes the entire effort less of a burden on the (Iron) GMs back. However, it has also brought about some rather interesting conflicts (in the loosest sense of the word)
Sometimes, I think, we forget that we are playing a game. Sometimes it would be easier if we just approached gaming as a collabortative round-table storytelling session in the more traditional sense. Sometimes the over-analysis of the game system and it's ability to deliver the type and quality of game that we desire can almost kill off a game before we start it. I sometimes feel that there is a tendency for us to verge towards 'that which we know and trust' (ie. 3e and Unisystem Lite) because we know they work.
Now I have a confession, here, on my blog. I like crunch. I like games where you know all the little things about your character. I like games with mathematical constructs for societies and lifepaths and all manner of other things. Give me a nice complicated character generation system and I am in seventh heaven. Hell, I'll admit that, given a small amount of time and a rulebook I have been known in the past to do my fair share of mini-maxing! BUT I like it the most because these systems give the creative process a framework that I can hang my ideas on. It gives me a skeleton to build my character on and to spin less obvious ideas off. I miss my crunch sometimes as well...
So what does this have to do with the Burning Wheel? Well, it is crunchy...damned crunchy. However, it's crunchy on the right side of the table. Once the crunch has been resolved, I think it will be a rather smooth system suited for a small group of players (and here I am talking two or three max). The game itself is written with some very familiar concepts that mirror our gaming well.
For example, if you highlight that one of your beliefs is that the Evil Dread Overlord MUST be overthrown than by God, the GM is rulesbound to put you in a situation that will allow you to pursue that belief. If you have an allergy to dragonvenom, then the next poison used on you WILL be dragonvenom! The players drive the concepts within the story as part of their character generation - they deliver unto the GM all of the bits than he has to meld into one wonderful adventure. It's ace.
Similarly, a lot of the concepts of game advancement mirror our practices. If you think that you should improve a trait then it is put to the vote - you have to prove to everyone that you deserve it! A nightmare in the land of the munchkin players but something akin to our experience votes in Buffy.
Where the game gets extra crunchy is the scripted combat. This is like the antithesis of our current combat ethos (ie. we like cinematic combat for mooks and bold, epic combat for 'bosses'). Burning Wheel combat is a chaotic mix of luck and guesswork. You script your moves in three sections and then match them up like scissor/paper/stones. One hit can cripple you for months if you do not have a healer...it's awesomely dangerous.
However, one other aspect of my games is that I abhor unnessecary combat. Wandering monsters left my games when I was 13. Pointless wastes of time and energy. So having a complicated but deadly aspect of the game that emerges once in a while is appealing. You CAN fight, but at your own risk and the consequences could be dire.
Everytime I pick up the books, more than any other game I have seen, I think 'I could really do something with this.' but it's something that I doubt I will get the chance to do in the near future - and not because of the guys that I game with (*waves at guys that he games with*) but more to do with an advancement of gaming and what we want from it.
A desire not to get scorched by the Burning Wheel maybe?
Neil
Monday, December 05, 2005
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
A Matter of Age?
Age is a funny thing.
Many of my hobbies are plagued by an attitude that you get too old to do them. Comics and games are for kids surely? How can an adult get thrills from wrestling shows? When are you going to grow up and start taking life seriously?
Statements like the last one make me really angry....REALLY angry. Like, instant loss of temper angry. You see I take life very very seriously indeed. I have a wife and two wonderful children, a house and a cat. I have a job and as part of a relatively small team, my actions in that job can impact on everyone else in that team. Thats a lot of responsibility and serious concentration.
And THATS why, when I have some spare time, I like to do something completely different, like play games or read comics or watch wrestling.
There is another reason, more deep set in my psyche. I downright refuse to embrace the banality that I have seen sweep over some of the other people I know. There really is no logical, personal or societal imperative that I have come across that justifies the need to abandon friends and interests as your years advance. How can I play pretend games with my children if I have abandoned the imperative to have an imagination? How can I relate to their ideas of the world if I have no idea about the music or culture that they are surrounded by (I still listen to Radio 1 and watch Childrens BBC with them)? What possible harm does it do to the world if I can play Boggies with them when needed?
And yet to many people, this makes me somehow less of a man, less of a husband and less of a father. I abandon my children when I play games and I have under-developed skills that are needed of a man (like my not being a mechanic when I cannot even drive!). It's utter madness, in my opinion!
Or is it?
One idea has settled in my mind over the last few weeks and thats that as a 35 year old man with an 8 year old daughter, spending some of my social time with 14 year olds playing cards or going out on boozy nights with 18 year olds might seem slightly suspect? Might seem a little out of place? Yes, it might - and that probably means that I need to look at how I carry myself at these events.
I also recently had a curious reaction to something online. I was offered the chance to by a black Cthulhu branded silicon wristband (ala the Lance Armstrong ones) for only £1.60. I thought 'wow, how cool is that?!' and even added it to my paypal basket and then.... I thought, where the HELL would I use it? I would never wear it during the day or at night...it would just sit there. The only time I could wear it would be when I was out with the lads and that would just be like some sort of 'away day uniform' - something I am trying to avoid.
So I didn't buy it. Does this mean that I am growing up (God, how I hate that phrase. At 6' tall and 23 stone, I'm ALL growed up thanks!) or does it just mean that I am hauling in some of my activities?
Who knows?
Neil
Many of my hobbies are plagued by an attitude that you get too old to do them. Comics and games are for kids surely? How can an adult get thrills from wrestling shows? When are you going to grow up and start taking life seriously?
Statements like the last one make me really angry....REALLY angry. Like, instant loss of temper angry. You see I take life very very seriously indeed. I have a wife and two wonderful children, a house and a cat. I have a job and as part of a relatively small team, my actions in that job can impact on everyone else in that team. Thats a lot of responsibility and serious concentration.
And THATS why, when I have some spare time, I like to do something completely different, like play games or read comics or watch wrestling.
There is another reason, more deep set in my psyche. I downright refuse to embrace the banality that I have seen sweep over some of the other people I know. There really is no logical, personal or societal imperative that I have come across that justifies the need to abandon friends and interests as your years advance. How can I play pretend games with my children if I have abandoned the imperative to have an imagination? How can I relate to their ideas of the world if I have no idea about the music or culture that they are surrounded by (I still listen to Radio 1 and watch Childrens BBC with them)? What possible harm does it do to the world if I can play Boggies with them when needed?
And yet to many people, this makes me somehow less of a man, less of a husband and less of a father. I abandon my children when I play games and I have under-developed skills that are needed of a man (like my not being a mechanic when I cannot even drive!). It's utter madness, in my opinion!
Or is it?
One idea has settled in my mind over the last few weeks and thats that as a 35 year old man with an 8 year old daughter, spending some of my social time with 14 year olds playing cards or going out on boozy nights with 18 year olds might seem slightly suspect? Might seem a little out of place? Yes, it might - and that probably means that I need to look at how I carry myself at these events.
I also recently had a curious reaction to something online. I was offered the chance to by a black Cthulhu branded silicon wristband (ala the Lance Armstrong ones) for only £1.60. I thought 'wow, how cool is that?!' and even added it to my paypal basket and then.... I thought, where the HELL would I use it? I would never wear it during the day or at night...it would just sit there. The only time I could wear it would be when I was out with the lads and that would just be like some sort of 'away day uniform' - something I am trying to avoid.
So I didn't buy it. Does this mean that I am growing up (God, how I hate that phrase. At 6' tall and 23 stone, I'm ALL growed up thanks!) or does it just mean that I am hauling in some of my activities?
Who knows?
Neil
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
RPG4LIFE
I'm skipping cooking to get my teeth into the real monster topic of this series of prologue-blogs: roleplaying. 'Dungeons and Dragons' for the one or two people who might read this blog, knowing me and not knowing what it is, and thus needing a reference point.
I've been roleplaying since I was around 12-ish. Thats 22 years of dice-chucking. I can remember vividly reading the D&D cartoons in the back of my comics on holiday in Berwick and desperately wanting to make the jump from Fighting Fantasy to D&D. I even found the Basic set in a toy shop in Berwick but my parents would never allow me to buy a game without a board! It was only later on my birthday, when I had control of my own cash that I bought the red-box D&D basic set and my life changed forever.
From that moment on, I was a roleplayer. I have roleplayed in some way, shape or form from that day on till now with one three-year gap at University* The one constant in my life has been roleplaying. My closest friends have always been the people that I roleplay with - it has just been natural. Some men play golf, some men get drunk - I pretend to be (inevitably) a bard!
My position in gaming has been well established since my youth as well. I am the DM, GM, Referee, Storyteller - whatever you choose to call it, perennially, thats me. Not all of the time, admittedly, but most of the time. When we are at a loss as to what to play next, it's usually me that comes up with the idea. One of our current stalwarts has even dubbed me 'The Iron DM' - which I find hilarious.
I'm in no way a roleplaying purist. I have done online RPG via NWN. I found this both highly enjoyable and intensely frustrating because whilst it delivered in many areas, it never quite had the pace that I desired. I have done play-by-email gaming, which I found to be a superb outlet for my roleplaying needs and my writer needs! Two birds with one stone. I have done 'e-fed' gaming, where you play a wrestler. Awesome stuff but it can be a little time consuming for something that shouldn't really be. I have done Live Action Roleplaying... the 'Vampire' sort rather than the 'Rubber Swords' variety. Great experience but I wouldn't do it again seriously as the consequences of the interpersonal developments in the game were mostly negative.
And I have done TONs of tabletop gaming. Oodles of it.
I could write vast missives on what I have done in the past, but I will focus in on the current group and what we are (or rather are not) doing at the moment. This group has been around since 2000/1 and was brought together when the new D&D 3.0 rules offered a focal point to a number of people who were a little disjointed about their gaming. Since that day we have lost one member to a job move to Sheffield, another to basketball and another to real life caring for his wife. And we have gained one member from my Raw Deal shennangins. We currently sit at 5, which for me is the perfect number.
We started playing D&D 3.0 in a self made setting called 'The Crescent Sea' - 20 weeks of high fantasy, high adventure, global war, toil and romance ensued and it was good. Really good. As a group learning to game with each other, it was great. We then moved onto two seasons of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer RPG. This, for me, was probably the high point of our gaming. Great games, great laughs, great characters and something that actually started and finished and kept a common voice throughout.
We have done some other stuff - Shadowrun, D&D, WHRPG V2, Werewolf and Exalted - but none have stuck. Indeed, we seem to have come to a timetabling and concept impasse as a group. It's hard to explain in a few words, so I reserve my right to use many.
1. We've all grown up a lot recently. One of us started as a bog-standard teacher and is now head of department at a prestigious school. One of us was recently a student but now is a manager at a call centre. One of us was 'between jobs' in academia and is now a Senior Lecturer. I myself was a simple educational admin and now I'm the grandly titled 'Marketing and Development Manager'. One of us even emigrated to Australia (and came back!). Theres a lot of time and energy being drained from us and that has had an impact on our gaming - either we cancel a lot or we are too knackered to get into it properly. OK, we have identified that masses of pizza and pop probably wasn't helping and have switched to a new 'fruit and fibre' style of gaming snack, which helps but it's a lot to do with work burnout.
2. Some of us, me included, may have got our heads a little trapped between our buttocks when it comes to 'quality of gaming' issues. We have found a style of gaming (low planning, lots of player input, definitely player lead stories etc) that we love but now the style seems to have become the focus rather than the activity itself. We are concerned about some things which, to be honest, are ephemeral bullshit that we never needed when we were playing The Crescent Sea. We never cared about the tone of the campaign or the medium-term character development goals of the druid - we simply wanted to see whether the Baddie Gods would be able to eat all of the people before the goodies could save the world! The rest came naturally.
3. We are having severe self doubt issues - a bunch of young middle aged men wondering whether they will be able to perform again? Hmmm..... couldn't see that one coming. A degree of fatalistic malaise has beset some of us - the game is cursed, I can't commit to making another character for a game that will not happen, you guys game without me until I have time - we've said and done it all. What we need is that gaming equivalent of a good hard drunken shag!
So where are we now? Well, at the minute we are just about to start playing the third and final season of Buffy. Well, 'just about to' is a relative term. We were planning to start on 04/11 but one person could not make it so we did the character conversions and upgrades. Then the next time, someone else couldn't make it (me, because of the parents evening) and then our host has been condemned to Work Hell until mid-December.... you see how it goes?
However, roleplaying has ONE significant benefit over the vast morass of other hobbies I practice. I'm not stopping roleplaying for anyone or anything. I've been a gamer since I was 12, I;m now 34 and when I am 56 I thoroughly expect to still be a gamer. Therefore I can wait. My ideas for games can only get better by sitting on them for a little bit. When our host is ready, so will I be and then we can go - thats all very cool.
In the meantime, I might try something else?! Word has reached me that the old efed I played in is about to reopen. Excellent! I might try to persuade someone to try some one-on-one playing to see whether that works. You see, because something will - eventually - work well again. As long as we keep trying and keep focused that we ARE roleplayers and we DO want to roleplay, then we will.
And thats one thing that I am 100% confident of, in this blog of doubts and misgivings
Roleplaying stays.
Neil
* I discovered that the gamers at Uni were all members of the Goth Society, the Rock Society and the Occultist Society and each and every one of them was a sociopathic wanker. I decided for the good of my health and theirs to not game with them and instead to have copious amounts of sex. Good call!
I've been roleplaying since I was around 12-ish. Thats 22 years of dice-chucking. I can remember vividly reading the D&D cartoons in the back of my comics on holiday in Berwick and desperately wanting to make the jump from Fighting Fantasy to D&D. I even found the Basic set in a toy shop in Berwick but my parents would never allow me to buy a game without a board! It was only later on my birthday, when I had control of my own cash that I bought the red-box D&D basic set and my life changed forever.
From that moment on, I was a roleplayer. I have roleplayed in some way, shape or form from that day on till now with one three-year gap at University* The one constant in my life has been roleplaying. My closest friends have always been the people that I roleplay with - it has just been natural. Some men play golf, some men get drunk - I pretend to be (inevitably) a bard!
My position in gaming has been well established since my youth as well. I am the DM, GM, Referee, Storyteller - whatever you choose to call it, perennially, thats me. Not all of the time, admittedly, but most of the time. When we are at a loss as to what to play next, it's usually me that comes up with the idea. One of our current stalwarts has even dubbed me 'The Iron DM' - which I find hilarious.
I'm in no way a roleplaying purist. I have done online RPG via NWN. I found this both highly enjoyable and intensely frustrating because whilst it delivered in many areas, it never quite had the pace that I desired. I have done play-by-email gaming, which I found to be a superb outlet for my roleplaying needs and my writer needs! Two birds with one stone. I have done 'e-fed' gaming, where you play a wrestler. Awesome stuff but it can be a little time consuming for something that shouldn't really be. I have done Live Action Roleplaying... the 'Vampire' sort rather than the 'Rubber Swords' variety. Great experience but I wouldn't do it again seriously as the consequences of the interpersonal developments in the game were mostly negative.
And I have done TONs of tabletop gaming. Oodles of it.
I could write vast missives on what I have done in the past, but I will focus in on the current group and what we are (or rather are not) doing at the moment. This group has been around since 2000/1 and was brought together when the new D&D 3.0 rules offered a focal point to a number of people who were a little disjointed about their gaming. Since that day we have lost one member to a job move to Sheffield, another to basketball and another to real life caring for his wife. And we have gained one member from my Raw Deal shennangins. We currently sit at 5, which for me is the perfect number.
We started playing D&D 3.0 in a self made setting called 'The Crescent Sea' - 20 weeks of high fantasy, high adventure, global war, toil and romance ensued and it was good. Really good. As a group learning to game with each other, it was great. We then moved onto two seasons of the Buffy the Vampire Slayer RPG. This, for me, was probably the high point of our gaming. Great games, great laughs, great characters and something that actually started and finished and kept a common voice throughout.
We have done some other stuff - Shadowrun, D&D, WHRPG V2, Werewolf and Exalted - but none have stuck. Indeed, we seem to have come to a timetabling and concept impasse as a group. It's hard to explain in a few words, so I reserve my right to use many.
1. We've all grown up a lot recently. One of us started as a bog-standard teacher and is now head of department at a prestigious school. One of us was recently a student but now is a manager at a call centre. One of us was 'between jobs' in academia and is now a Senior Lecturer. I myself was a simple educational admin and now I'm the grandly titled 'Marketing and Development Manager'. One of us even emigrated to Australia (and came back!). Theres a lot of time and energy being drained from us and that has had an impact on our gaming - either we cancel a lot or we are too knackered to get into it properly. OK, we have identified that masses of pizza and pop probably wasn't helping and have switched to a new 'fruit and fibre' style of gaming snack, which helps but it's a lot to do with work burnout.
2. Some of us, me included, may have got our heads a little trapped between our buttocks when it comes to 'quality of gaming' issues. We have found a style of gaming (low planning, lots of player input, definitely player lead stories etc) that we love but now the style seems to have become the focus rather than the activity itself. We are concerned about some things which, to be honest, are ephemeral bullshit that we never needed when we were playing The Crescent Sea. We never cared about the tone of the campaign or the medium-term character development goals of the druid - we simply wanted to see whether the Baddie Gods would be able to eat all of the people before the goodies could save the world! The rest came naturally.
3. We are having severe self doubt issues - a bunch of young middle aged men wondering whether they will be able to perform again? Hmmm..... couldn't see that one coming. A degree of fatalistic malaise has beset some of us - the game is cursed, I can't commit to making another character for a game that will not happen, you guys game without me until I have time - we've said and done it all. What we need is that gaming equivalent of a good hard drunken shag!
So where are we now? Well, at the minute we are just about to start playing the third and final season of Buffy. Well, 'just about to' is a relative term. We were planning to start on 04/11 but one person could not make it so we did the character conversions and upgrades. Then the next time, someone else couldn't make it (me, because of the parents evening) and then our host has been condemned to Work Hell until mid-December.... you see how it goes?
However, roleplaying has ONE significant benefit over the vast morass of other hobbies I practice. I'm not stopping roleplaying for anyone or anything. I've been a gamer since I was 12, I;m now 34 and when I am 56 I thoroughly expect to still be a gamer. Therefore I can wait. My ideas for games can only get better by sitting on them for a little bit. When our host is ready, so will I be and then we can go - thats all very cool.
In the meantime, I might try something else?! Word has reached me that the old efed I played in is about to reopen. Excellent! I might try to persuade someone to try some one-on-one playing to see whether that works. You see, because something will - eventually - work well again. As long as we keep trying and keep focused that we ARE roleplayers and we DO want to roleplay, then we will.
And thats one thing that I am 100% confident of, in this blog of doubts and misgivings
Roleplaying stays.
Neil
* I discovered that the gamers at Uni were all members of the Goth Society, the Rock Society and the Occultist Society and each and every one of them was a sociopathic wanker. I decided for the good of my health and theirs to not game with them and instead to have copious amounts of sex. Good call!
UPDATE: Rediscovered my smile...
Well, it was the last Pay Per View Raw Deal event of the year this weekend. I have really mixed feelings about it. It had a pathetically low turnout of only 18 players BUT we had an amazing time. I even got to play - it felt really good...playing. And winning. And losing. But playing was the major thing.
It also felt like a watershed. We've been riding high this year but some aspects of the game have been delayed and that has meant that a lot of players have got itchy feet. It felt, for all intents and purposes, like rather than being given a chance to bow out gracefully, it was a chance to re-assess, re-evaluate and rebuild from a new set of reduced foundations. I know that many many of the people who were there were talking about what was happening next year and what sort of things they would like to see in the future. Which was good.
So much so that it has sort of invigorated me towards Raw Deal a little. I've now got a new and realistic timetable in my head about website developments and whats happening there. I have ideas for new decks and how I want to manage the balance between playing and organising. I think that any realistic plans for me to resign en masse from my positions has been put on a definite hold for now.
Which is good, because during the weekend there were at least a dozen times when I could have told everyone I was resigning and didn't for some reason. Act in haste, repent at leisure maybe?
More, inevitably, later
Neil
It also felt like a watershed. We've been riding high this year but some aspects of the game have been delayed and that has meant that a lot of players have got itchy feet. It felt, for all intents and purposes, like rather than being given a chance to bow out gracefully, it was a chance to re-assess, re-evaluate and rebuild from a new set of reduced foundations. I know that many many of the people who were there were talking about what was happening next year and what sort of things they would like to see in the future. Which was good.
So much so that it has sort of invigorated me towards Raw Deal a little. I've now got a new and realistic timetable in my head about website developments and whats happening there. I have ideas for new decks and how I want to manage the balance between playing and organising. I think that any realistic plans for me to resign en masse from my positions has been put on a definite hold for now.
Which is good, because during the weekend there were at least a dozen times when I could have told everyone I was resigning and didn't for some reason. Act in haste, repent at leisure maybe?
More, inevitably, later
Neil
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Wrasslin'!
Ah wrestling - memories of Saturday afternoons spent innocently with my Grandad, drinking home-made tomato soup (made from carrots - which always amazed me) with too much pepper in, watching the wrestling and then sitting silently through the football results incase he missed the numbers which would have announced his passage into the realms of the millionaire! These are the memories that childhoods are made of!
Skip forwards to the year 2000 and my father-in-laws ridiculously bothced attempt to alter our internal cable forced our hand into getting SKY TV ... and thus I was able to watch WWF (as was) TV for the first time. WOW! I'd been passingly aware of the genre but I had never been able to immerse myself in it. The Rock, HHH, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Mankind, Kurt Angle - the list goes on. I would watch it all. I watched WCW as well, on Channel 4 (or was it 5?) and it was all good.
Well, ish. You see some people couldn't understand how an articulate, educated man could possibly derive pleasure from something that 'wasn't real'. I laughed
I mean, whats not real about wrestling? The people are real, the sets are real, the fans are real. It seems real to me? More real than say...oh, Middle Earth or the starship Enterprise? Oh, what you ACTUALLY mean is that the wrestlers are pretending to hit each other... and the matches are 'fixed'.
No? Really? You mean a man can't be punched in the head ten times and not come out like a bloody mess? How could I have missed that? Could it possibly be the same way that when he finished his role as Anakin in the new Star Wars films, Hayden Christiansen did not have his legs amputated? He faked that injury? Oh, and how in Coronation Street, the actors sort of know how each episode will end? Because it's all predetermined you know... fake!
Wrestling is STAGED. It is a very physical soap opera - nothing more, nothing less. Trying to think that those that enjoy it think it is anything else is an insult to their intelligence and yours.
So anyway, my viewing continued - Friday nights and Saturday nights. And then I got an email.
THE email
" Dear Neil, blah blah webmaster blah blah Seattle blah blah World Championship blah blah WRESTLEMANIA TICKETS."
Hold the effin' phone!
So that year I was flown by Comic Images to Seattle where I got comp. tickets to the biggest wrestling event of the year. And the next year it was New York, and the year after that Los Angeles. Wow.
Watching wrestling live was a strange experience. First thing you are struck with is the relative size of the venues and the number of people. Then, the realisation that for many Americans this is like going to the cinema - no bowel rending excitement here. And then the matches start and there is no commentary. OOK?! Thats weird.
From my three Wrestlemanias, I have rarely been able to throw off my reserved British nature and start screaming and hollering for my favourite stars. I just sort of kick back and watch the spectacle. It's interesting. It's exhilarating - but I seem to get stuff from it that others don't.
So anyway, this triggered a wrestling spurt for me. Naturally, my normal information centred obsessions had kicked in years before and I had created a small information hub around my wrestling interest. Now I was watching indie videos, spending hours watching the wrestling channel, playing in wrestling PBEM games and all the Raw Deal stuff that I have documented before.
And then, suddenly, it just stopped.
And I have NO IDEA why?
I just stopped going to my local indie fed. No idea why I did, but I did. It just wasn't convenient anymore. And the WWE moves their shows to different nights and that just seemed to clash with my other pursuits in such a way that I hardly ever see RAW anymore - and even less Smackdown. I am far more likely to catch Velocity or Afterburn. I never even tune into the Wrestling Channel anymore. I do still read the news sites every day and I am still 'knowledgeable' about the genre, but the ferocity of fandom seemed to wane overnight.
Strange eh?
I have a very settled view on the entire 'sport' - I reckon its something that you only really should watch for a couple of years and still be emotionally attached to it. After that the storylines begin to repeat themselves and you begin to see patterns emerging and it all becomes very predictable.
Still - a fan, a casual fan
Neil
Skip forwards to the year 2000 and my father-in-laws ridiculously bothced attempt to alter our internal cable forced our hand into getting SKY TV ... and thus I was able to watch WWF (as was) TV for the first time. WOW! I'd been passingly aware of the genre but I had never been able to immerse myself in it. The Rock, HHH, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Mankind, Kurt Angle - the list goes on. I would watch it all. I watched WCW as well, on Channel 4 (or was it 5?) and it was all good.
Well, ish. You see some people couldn't understand how an articulate, educated man could possibly derive pleasure from something that 'wasn't real'. I laughed
I mean, whats not real about wrestling? The people are real, the sets are real, the fans are real. It seems real to me? More real than say...oh, Middle Earth or the starship Enterprise? Oh, what you ACTUALLY mean is that the wrestlers are pretending to hit each other... and the matches are 'fixed'.
No? Really? You mean a man can't be punched in the head ten times and not come out like a bloody mess? How could I have missed that? Could it possibly be the same way that when he finished his role as Anakin in the new Star Wars films, Hayden Christiansen did not have his legs amputated? He faked that injury? Oh, and how in Coronation Street, the actors sort of know how each episode will end? Because it's all predetermined you know... fake!
Wrestling is STAGED. It is a very physical soap opera - nothing more, nothing less. Trying to think that those that enjoy it think it is anything else is an insult to their intelligence and yours.
So anyway, my viewing continued - Friday nights and Saturday nights. And then I got an email.
THE email
" Dear Neil, blah blah webmaster blah blah Seattle blah blah World Championship blah blah WRESTLEMANIA TICKETS."
Hold the effin' phone!
So that year I was flown by Comic Images to Seattle where I got comp. tickets to the biggest wrestling event of the year. And the next year it was New York, and the year after that Los Angeles. Wow.
Watching wrestling live was a strange experience. First thing you are struck with is the relative size of the venues and the number of people. Then, the realisation that for many Americans this is like going to the cinema - no bowel rending excitement here. And then the matches start and there is no commentary. OOK?! Thats weird.
From my three Wrestlemanias, I have rarely been able to throw off my reserved British nature and start screaming and hollering for my favourite stars. I just sort of kick back and watch the spectacle. It's interesting. It's exhilarating - but I seem to get stuff from it that others don't.
So anyway, this triggered a wrestling spurt for me. Naturally, my normal information centred obsessions had kicked in years before and I had created a small information hub around my wrestling interest. Now I was watching indie videos, spending hours watching the wrestling channel, playing in wrestling PBEM games and all the Raw Deal stuff that I have documented before.
And then, suddenly, it just stopped.
And I have NO IDEA why?
I just stopped going to my local indie fed. No idea why I did, but I did. It just wasn't convenient anymore. And the WWE moves their shows to different nights and that just seemed to clash with my other pursuits in such a way that I hardly ever see RAW anymore - and even less Smackdown. I am far more likely to catch Velocity or Afterburn. I never even tune into the Wrestling Channel anymore. I do still read the news sites every day and I am still 'knowledgeable' about the genre, but the ferocity of fandom seemed to wane overnight.
Strange eh?
I have a very settled view on the entire 'sport' - I reckon its something that you only really should watch for a couple of years and still be emotionally attached to it. After that the storylines begin to repeat themselves and you begin to see patterns emerging and it all becomes very predictable.
Still - a fan, a casual fan
Neil
Monday, November 21, 2005
The Slowest Ten Count in the World
Collectible Card Games.
Since around 1994 they have been a staple part of my entertainment. From Magic: The Gathering and Rage, through Babylon 5 and into Raw Deal, I have collected, played and more importantly organised CCG events for around 10 years now. Thats a long time.
And now I feel that my love affair may be coming to an end. Well, possibly. It could well be that my patience with certain aspects of the hobby has ran out. I don't know.
I started playing Magic. Like most people did at the time when they were getting into CCGs. I attended my first tournament and did ... OK. That was cool. A few more under my belt and I was doing ... OK. Hmm.. And then the organiser left Uni and the void needed to be filled - and I volunteered.
I had a good time running those MtG tournaments. We were small and unsanctioned, but we always managed to have a laugh, dish out decent prizes, cover costs and develop our games. I even won one or two, but never consistently. I remember the day that I stopped wanting to run MtG tournaments - it was the 'North East Championship', a local thing. We did 6 rounds - two Type 1, two Type 2 and two 'Extended' format. It was a lot of fun but at the end of the day not one person in the room said 'Thank you' to me for organising it.
That annoyed me no end. So I stopped and handed the baton onto someone else and let them organise it. My interest in Magic had waned anyway in the light of the new CCG on the block - Babylon 5. B5 was my fave TV series, so it was natural for me to play. It was multiplayer, which was well cool and it was a good game. However, to have tournaments you needed a Ranger. So I volunteered. Eventually I got in contact with other Rangers and we made our own UK 'group' - Black Omega. We had a website (published by me) and a print newsletter (published by me). We ran big tournaments and had printed t-shirts. We became recognised by the parent company and began distributing prize support for the UK, then Ireland and then the Eastern hemisphere of the World. By this time I was Head Ranger in Black Omega. It was fun. It was hard work!
And then the game folded due to WB removing all B5 licences. Dead as a dodo
But the new kid was on the block again...the Raw Deal CCG, based on the (then) WWF product. Great quick brutal card game. We had a manager - and it wasn't me. Indeed, I famously quoted that I would never get involved with the running of this game.
To cut a long story short, that was 4 years ago and this is currently what I do:
(a) I am the UK Commissioner. That means that I appoint new managers, send out Prize Support (which started as a few cards, but now entails cards and posters and DVDs). I organise large tournaments around the country and process rankings to be sent over to the states.
(b) I am Lead Playtester. I get the cards very very early and have to read through them and test them and make sure that they are not 'broken'
(c) I run a UK web forum called Squared Circle which acts as the hub for the UK RD community. It used to be a much bigger website, but that withered on the vine when I became..
(d) The Webmaster of the Official Raw Deal website. And yes, that is potentially as much work as it sounds.
(e) I'm the manager for Newcastle - allowing me to run tournaments of my own in the pub
Played Neil - so much for keeping yourself distant from the organisation of the game!
Now I'm not going to say that this is without it's benefits. As UK Commissioner and Webmaster and Playtester I receive a substantial amount of free product from the parent company. That means that I have not had to buy a card for some years now and I even manage to dole a load out to my friends as well. I get a bonus each year of a working holiday to Wrestlemania, to cover the world championships live on the web. Thats so cool it hurts! I have made a metric TON of new friends in the UK and around the globe and was even honoured by them and awarded the 'UK Raw Deal Personality of the Decade' award recently. No that....thats cool!
So why on Earth would I want to stop doing this?
Thats a very good question - lets take them one by one
(a) Like every commissioner before me, I have come to the conclusion that the job really isn't worth the hassle. Its a large volunteer management and servicing task which takes up a disproprotionate amount of time to the benefits it delivers. It also takes up space in the house and balancing the various financial commitments can be a nightmare. Additionally (and this may just be a personality trait here) it is very much a balls-on-the-line job. Every national PPV event has to be better than the last, or something is very wrong. Its a level of .... unnecessary stress ... that just isnt needed in my life. I guess you also need to be enthusiastic about the game and about building the game and I don't think I am anymore. Don't get me wrong, I love Raw Deal and think that it is a great pastime, but I have been wounded along the way too much for me to be truly passionate about it as I was.
(b) For a number of reasons, my position as a playtester is more a product of me being the webmaster and head judge for the UK rather than for my testing prowess or dedication. There are others that are far better placed to do this job than I am and really, it's only pride and curiosity that keep me here, which is a bad thing.
(c) This could actually be one of the big reasons. I have grown very very very tired of a number of the UK RD community and their attitude to the game. This attitude problem is something that absolutely fascinates me and I will no doubt talk about in the future but needless to say, it revolves around the adage that if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. The sheer volume of harsh and unfoundned criticism that explodes on my site and others at each and every announcement or posting by a Comic Images employee or games designer is quite frankly beyond the pale. The vocal minority have created a strange bizarro world where everything is deceit and lies, nothing is as it seems and every decision being made is in some way designed to screw everyone over and improve the lot of CI by destroying the game. The business sense doesn't follow there does it? Not a problem because like the Kings New Clothes, all they need to do is keep saying it and it becomes 'fact'. An experiment in subjective reality writ large upon the internet. I'm very very bored with it. Tired and bored.
(d) You fulfil the clients wishes and that makes the project right yeah? When I took over the site and ever since, the #1 wish that Comic Images have expressed is that the site be updated regularly and punctually. They specifically did not want a flashy scipt driven site - they wanted something simple and full. So thats what I have delivered. And the site has remained reasonably stable for three years now. I have not, however, and I now know ways to do things that could really enhance the site. However...and this is the real shame. I cannot be arsed. It takes a pretty huge amount of time to do that and it's a process of concentration that I just don't seem to be able to muster anymore. Too many other distractions it would seem. Now this is MY critique, not theres. They have never asked for the site to be made better (expect for The Bloody Database of Doom) - but if you undertake to do a job, you should do it to the best of your abilities, right? I don't think I can do that anymore and I don't think it's fair on the company to be landed with a lame duck site when they could have something that is really top notch.
(e) Hardly anyone can be arsed to play anymore. Not because they don't want to - just because they find it easier to talk about WoW more!
Lots of compelling reasons to jack it all in yeah? So why haven't I done it?
Well, on one hand, I am not and have never been (in my eyes) a quitter. I should be able to do at least the website side of things better. I really should. But I don't. I really like the people I work with on the game. Some of them are a pain sometimes but most of them are superstars and indeed, my friends. I would miss them. A lot. It would be very strange to think that all I needed to do would be to send one letter and I would never ever see them again. Indeed, I could just remove the links from the sites, and I need never think about all of that stuff again. But I would.
My wish would be that after Christmas I could give them my notice and help get a new webmaster settled into his job and that my last act as Neil The Raw Deal Dude would be to cover the World Championships from Chicago.
I doubt that would happen. I mean, why would anyone want to extend that level of largesse to someone who has just left their company in the lurch.
Gah.
I am undecided what to do with this. Every night I travel home determined to do something RD related and every night I find an excuse to do something else. I'm at a loss. I really am. I know in my heart of hearts that I still want to play sometimes but whether I can throw the rest away or whether my enthusiasm is truly salvage-able, I am foxed.
Neil
Since around 1994 they have been a staple part of my entertainment. From Magic: The Gathering and Rage, through Babylon 5 and into Raw Deal, I have collected, played and more importantly organised CCG events for around 10 years now. Thats a long time.
And now I feel that my love affair may be coming to an end. Well, possibly. It could well be that my patience with certain aspects of the hobby has ran out. I don't know.
I started playing Magic. Like most people did at the time when they were getting into CCGs. I attended my first tournament and did ... OK. That was cool. A few more under my belt and I was doing ... OK. Hmm.. And then the organiser left Uni and the void needed to be filled - and I volunteered.
I had a good time running those MtG tournaments. We were small and unsanctioned, but we always managed to have a laugh, dish out decent prizes, cover costs and develop our games. I even won one or two, but never consistently. I remember the day that I stopped wanting to run MtG tournaments - it was the 'North East Championship', a local thing. We did 6 rounds - two Type 1, two Type 2 and two 'Extended' format. It was a lot of fun but at the end of the day not one person in the room said 'Thank you' to me for organising it.
That annoyed me no end. So I stopped and handed the baton onto someone else and let them organise it. My interest in Magic had waned anyway in the light of the new CCG on the block - Babylon 5. B5 was my fave TV series, so it was natural for me to play. It was multiplayer, which was well cool and it was a good game. However, to have tournaments you needed a Ranger. So I volunteered. Eventually I got in contact with other Rangers and we made our own UK 'group' - Black Omega. We had a website (published by me) and a print newsletter (published by me). We ran big tournaments and had printed t-shirts. We became recognised by the parent company and began distributing prize support for the UK, then Ireland and then the Eastern hemisphere of the World. By this time I was Head Ranger in Black Omega. It was fun. It was hard work!
And then the game folded due to WB removing all B5 licences. Dead as a dodo
But the new kid was on the block again...the Raw Deal CCG, based on the (then) WWF product. Great quick brutal card game. We had a manager - and it wasn't me. Indeed, I famously quoted that I would never get involved with the running of this game.
To cut a long story short, that was 4 years ago and this is currently what I do:
(a) I am the UK Commissioner. That means that I appoint new managers, send out Prize Support (which started as a few cards, but now entails cards and posters and DVDs). I organise large tournaments around the country and process rankings to be sent over to the states.
(b) I am Lead Playtester. I get the cards very very early and have to read through them and test them and make sure that they are not 'broken'
(c) I run a UK web forum called Squared Circle which acts as the hub for the UK RD community. It used to be a much bigger website, but that withered on the vine when I became..
(d) The Webmaster of the Official Raw Deal website. And yes, that is potentially as much work as it sounds.
(e) I'm the manager for Newcastle - allowing me to run tournaments of my own in the pub
Played Neil - so much for keeping yourself distant from the organisation of the game!
Now I'm not going to say that this is without it's benefits. As UK Commissioner and Webmaster and Playtester I receive a substantial amount of free product from the parent company. That means that I have not had to buy a card for some years now and I even manage to dole a load out to my friends as well. I get a bonus each year of a working holiday to Wrestlemania, to cover the world championships live on the web. Thats so cool it hurts! I have made a metric TON of new friends in the UK and around the globe and was even honoured by them and awarded the 'UK Raw Deal Personality of the Decade' award recently. No that....thats cool!
So why on Earth would I want to stop doing this?
Thats a very good question - lets take them one by one
(a) Like every commissioner before me, I have come to the conclusion that the job really isn't worth the hassle. Its a large volunteer management and servicing task which takes up a disproprotionate amount of time to the benefits it delivers. It also takes up space in the house and balancing the various financial commitments can be a nightmare. Additionally (and this may just be a personality trait here) it is very much a balls-on-the-line job. Every national PPV event has to be better than the last, or something is very wrong. Its a level of .... unnecessary stress ... that just isnt needed in my life. I guess you also need to be enthusiastic about the game and about building the game and I don't think I am anymore. Don't get me wrong, I love Raw Deal and think that it is a great pastime, but I have been wounded along the way too much for me to be truly passionate about it as I was.
(b) For a number of reasons, my position as a playtester is more a product of me being the webmaster and head judge for the UK rather than for my testing prowess or dedication. There are others that are far better placed to do this job than I am and really, it's only pride and curiosity that keep me here, which is a bad thing.
(c) This could actually be one of the big reasons. I have grown very very very tired of a number of the UK RD community and their attitude to the game. This attitude problem is something that absolutely fascinates me and I will no doubt talk about in the future but needless to say, it revolves around the adage that if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. The sheer volume of harsh and unfoundned criticism that explodes on my site and others at each and every announcement or posting by a Comic Images employee or games designer is quite frankly beyond the pale. The vocal minority have created a strange bizarro world where everything is deceit and lies, nothing is as it seems and every decision being made is in some way designed to screw everyone over and improve the lot of CI by destroying the game. The business sense doesn't follow there does it? Not a problem because like the Kings New Clothes, all they need to do is keep saying it and it becomes 'fact'. An experiment in subjective reality writ large upon the internet. I'm very very bored with it. Tired and bored.
(d) You fulfil the clients wishes and that makes the project right yeah? When I took over the site and ever since, the #1 wish that Comic Images have expressed is that the site be updated regularly and punctually. They specifically did not want a flashy scipt driven site - they wanted something simple and full. So thats what I have delivered. And the site has remained reasonably stable for three years now. I have not, however, and I now know ways to do things that could really enhance the site. However...and this is the real shame. I cannot be arsed. It takes a pretty huge amount of time to do that and it's a process of concentration that I just don't seem to be able to muster anymore. Too many other distractions it would seem. Now this is MY critique, not theres. They have never asked for the site to be made better (expect for The Bloody Database of Doom) - but if you undertake to do a job, you should do it to the best of your abilities, right? I don't think I can do that anymore and I don't think it's fair on the company to be landed with a lame duck site when they could have something that is really top notch.
(e) Hardly anyone can be arsed to play anymore. Not because they don't want to - just because they find it easier to talk about WoW more!
Lots of compelling reasons to jack it all in yeah? So why haven't I done it?
Well, on one hand, I am not and have never been (in my eyes) a quitter. I should be able to do at least the website side of things better. I really should. But I don't. I really like the people I work with on the game. Some of them are a pain sometimes but most of them are superstars and indeed, my friends. I would miss them. A lot. It would be very strange to think that all I needed to do would be to send one letter and I would never ever see them again. Indeed, I could just remove the links from the sites, and I need never think about all of that stuff again. But I would.
My wish would be that after Christmas I could give them my notice and help get a new webmaster settled into his job and that my last act as Neil The Raw Deal Dude would be to cover the World Championships from Chicago.
I doubt that would happen. I mean, why would anyone want to extend that level of largesse to someone who has just left their company in the lurch.
Gah.
I am undecided what to do with this. Every night I travel home determined to do something RD related and every night I find an excuse to do something else. I'm at a loss. I really am. I know in my heart of hearts that I still want to play sometimes but whether I can throw the rest away or whether my enthusiasm is truly salvage-able, I am foxed.
Neil
The Sound of One Hand Typing
I'm going to cover fan fiction now. It's probably my most bizarre hobby, if it is indeed a hobby still - and something that I really struggle at times to understand.
You see, there are a few things that I need to make perfectly clear from the start:
(a) I am not, in any way, shape, or form, a person who aspires to be a writer. I do not believe that within me there is The Great British Novel, bursting to get out. Therefore my writings have nothing to do with any progressions from serial fiction to novella to fully blown book.
(b) I have no interested whatsoever in becoming a TV or film scriptwriter, or having anything adpated for anything, anywhere. Nothing. Nada. Never thought about it until someone mentioned it to me a few years back. Nope.
(c) Whilst it is nice to daydream and think that one day a lazy DC executive would stumble across Jesse and Jade and suddenly I would be propelled into the limelight as the new J.M.DeMatteis, I have no real compulsion to write real comics. I am never going to send a specualtive submit to Marvel or DC or any wee little wannabe comic company. Not my scene
With that out of the way, the question is still there - why do fanfic?
At one time, I would have said that fanfic was what I did to replace the creative outlet when I wasn't roleplaying. However, for more time than not, I have been roleplaying regularly since 2000 and I have been writing all of that time. So thats a bit of a cop-out.
At other times I have claimed that I wrote my superhero fanfic because it was a backlash against the poor writing of some of my favourite titles in mainstream comics. Thats probably a little true - I always get a yearning to write The Avengers whenever I see the bilge that Brian Bendis produces passing as The Earths Mightiest Heroes. However, if that was so, I should be scribing madly in the wake of the truly mediocre 'House of Meh!' episode. But I am not.
Maybe it was because I liked to be part of that creative community, that coven of writers that was so supportive and critical at the same time. So willing to lend praise and feedback on your creations. So brotherly in their support for your real life woes. The continuity aspect of shared universe ventures really appeals to the comic geek in me, I know that - but those communities are still there and I am a voyeur on the borders at best - a memory of times gone by at worst.
So maybe in all that wordy soul searching the real reason was that I just wanted to tell a story - to see whether I could. I know that was certainly the case with Scarlet Witch, my first foray in the MV1 site. That was soon followed by The Crusaders and The Crusaders:Shadows - two books using the full pantheon of UK Marvel Superheroes at MV1. Quite good apparently. I then 'jumped ship' to pastures new, my dream assignment of The Avengers at MX. I have dallied with DC on Captain Comet (dire), Jesse and Jade (my fave), Stargirl (could have been good), Minuteman (another fave) and Batman (my best story IMO)
But it all stopped. I've tried, I really have - but there is something that simply stops me from being as explosive a creative talent as I have been in the past. I can get the initial idea - thats easy - but getting into that difficult third installment is always too much. I always falter - my mind is always dragged away into some other train of thought and the spark of creativity perishes.
Writing like this is something that I desperately want to do again. I can feel the need inside me to write - hell, writing these blogs is kind of like creative writing and it's almost as easy. Maybe I am done with the genre? Maybe I miss the spark of the community and the people within it. Everyone involved heavily nowadays seems so young and full of themselves...compared to when we were burning the trail. Hehehe lets not kid ourselves - we were just as bad!
I guess it's just waiting for the right idea to come along and the right moment to sit down and write to hit. And for me to stop playing so much bloody WoW!!!!!
Neil
You see, there are a few things that I need to make perfectly clear from the start:
(a) I am not, in any way, shape, or form, a person who aspires to be a writer. I do not believe that within me there is The Great British Novel, bursting to get out. Therefore my writings have nothing to do with any progressions from serial fiction to novella to fully blown book.
(b) I have no interested whatsoever in becoming a TV or film scriptwriter, or having anything adpated for anything, anywhere. Nothing. Nada. Never thought about it until someone mentioned it to me a few years back. Nope.
(c) Whilst it is nice to daydream and think that one day a lazy DC executive would stumble across Jesse and Jade and suddenly I would be propelled into the limelight as the new J.M.DeMatteis, I have no real compulsion to write real comics. I am never going to send a specualtive submit to Marvel or DC or any wee little wannabe comic company. Not my scene
With that out of the way, the question is still there - why do fanfic?
At one time, I would have said that fanfic was what I did to replace the creative outlet when I wasn't roleplaying. However, for more time than not, I have been roleplaying regularly since 2000 and I have been writing all of that time. So thats a bit of a cop-out.
At other times I have claimed that I wrote my superhero fanfic because it was a backlash against the poor writing of some of my favourite titles in mainstream comics. Thats probably a little true - I always get a yearning to write The Avengers whenever I see the bilge that Brian Bendis produces passing as The Earths Mightiest Heroes. However, if that was so, I should be scribing madly in the wake of the truly mediocre 'House of Meh!' episode. But I am not.
Maybe it was because I liked to be part of that creative community, that coven of writers that was so supportive and critical at the same time. So willing to lend praise and feedback on your creations. So brotherly in their support for your real life woes. The continuity aspect of shared universe ventures really appeals to the comic geek in me, I know that - but those communities are still there and I am a voyeur on the borders at best - a memory of times gone by at worst.
So maybe in all that wordy soul searching the real reason was that I just wanted to tell a story - to see whether I could. I know that was certainly the case with Scarlet Witch, my first foray in the MV1 site. That was soon followed by The Crusaders and The Crusaders:Shadows - two books using the full pantheon of UK Marvel Superheroes at MV1. Quite good apparently. I then 'jumped ship' to pastures new, my dream assignment of The Avengers at MX. I have dallied with DC on Captain Comet (dire), Jesse and Jade (my fave), Stargirl (could have been good), Minuteman (another fave) and Batman (my best story IMO)
But it all stopped. I've tried, I really have - but there is something that simply stops me from being as explosive a creative talent as I have been in the past. I can get the initial idea - thats easy - but getting into that difficult third installment is always too much. I always falter - my mind is always dragged away into some other train of thought and the spark of creativity perishes.
Writing like this is something that I desperately want to do again. I can feel the need inside me to write - hell, writing these blogs is kind of like creative writing and it's almost as easy. Maybe I am done with the genre? Maybe I miss the spark of the community and the people within it. Everyone involved heavily nowadays seems so young and full of themselves...compared to when we were burning the trail. Hehehe lets not kid ourselves - we were just as bad!
I guess it's just waiting for the right idea to come along and the right moment to sit down and write to hit. And for me to stop playing so much bloody WoW!!!!!
Neil
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Crisis on Finite Loft Space
Comics. Marvel and DC specifically. They have been integral to my life since I was 5. I can distinctly remember making the very adult decision to get rid of my subscription at the corner shop to Barnaby Comic and instead start getting The Avengers. That was the beginning.
Zip forward 30 years and I still read comics. I spend around £7 a week on them. I have a bunch of regulars and some that I occassionally pick up. Want to know what the regulars are? Lets see...
Justice League of America (JLA)
Justice Society of America (JSA)
Legion of Superheroes (LSH)
Hawkman
The New Avengers
Young Avengers
Thunderbolts
The Ultimates
Ultimate X-Men
Kabuki
Supreme Power
There might be some more - I can never tell. I just grab the stuff I want thats on the shelves at the moment. Especially all of the Infinite Crisis goodies - oh, thats a sweet series.
Anyway - whats up with comics as a hobby? Well, nothing really. They are there - I buy them and I read them and then I keep them.
Actually, thats the problem. I keep them. Comics are like books and in my mind books should never be got rid of, under any circumstances. You never know when you or someone else will want to read them again. The upshot of this is that I have 1000s of comics, stored in the loft. Many of them are in nice, difficult to access cardboard boxes. Many more are in rather ramshackle stacks.
Now, this presents two problems.
The first is that the sheer number of them makes doing anything with them improbable. You just cannot easily do anything with over 10,000 comics! I should really index them or sort them or get them into some sort of order instead of the pseudo-chronological towers that they dwell in at the moment. But it's just too big a job. Its not even something that you can easily break down into little bits. Its just massive!
I also need to look at some redundancy here. There are some comic series that I absolutely adore and that I would never part with - my Avengers and JLA/JSA collections - but what about the others? What about that stack of Nexus? Darkstars? Sub Mariner series III? And a myriad other things that have fallen into my lap over the years? Should I have a clear out and thin the mountain a little?
Or will my childhood come back to haunt me
When I was young, I had a trunk and in that trunk I kept my comics. One day, my Dad said that I should really get rid of some comics if I wanted to get any more - in that way that parents always just allow you to have a prescribed number of things? So my comics went to 'the orphans' - a generic destination for everything I owned it would appear.
What were these gems? Early Bryne and Claremont X-Men. Neal Adams Avengers. Early issues of the Defenders. Comics which I have had to hunt down and pay (in some cases) frankly ridiculous prices for in my adult years.
If I got rid of some of my comics, would I regret it in the future? Would I have to hunt them down again.
Ah buggeration. The problem faced by all hoarders, I believe.
Until I get my head around that little quandry, the comics will remain I guess. And grow. I need to get a load of long boxes however - and spend a day in the loft. Hehe, like I ever have a full day to do anything!
Neil
Zip forward 30 years and I still read comics. I spend around £7 a week on them. I have a bunch of regulars and some that I occassionally pick up. Want to know what the regulars are? Lets see...
Justice League of America (JLA)
Justice Society of America (JSA)
Legion of Superheroes (LSH)
Hawkman
The New Avengers
Young Avengers
Thunderbolts
The Ultimates
Ultimate X-Men
Kabuki
Supreme Power
There might be some more - I can never tell. I just grab the stuff I want thats on the shelves at the moment. Especially all of the Infinite Crisis goodies - oh, thats a sweet series.
Anyway - whats up with comics as a hobby? Well, nothing really. They are there - I buy them and I read them and then I keep them.
Actually, thats the problem. I keep them. Comics are like books and in my mind books should never be got rid of, under any circumstances. You never know when you or someone else will want to read them again. The upshot of this is that I have 1000s of comics, stored in the loft. Many of them are in nice, difficult to access cardboard boxes. Many more are in rather ramshackle stacks.
Now, this presents two problems.
The first is that the sheer number of them makes doing anything with them improbable. You just cannot easily do anything with over 10,000 comics! I should really index them or sort them or get them into some sort of order instead of the pseudo-chronological towers that they dwell in at the moment. But it's just too big a job. Its not even something that you can easily break down into little bits. Its just massive!
I also need to look at some redundancy here. There are some comic series that I absolutely adore and that I would never part with - my Avengers and JLA/JSA collections - but what about the others? What about that stack of Nexus? Darkstars? Sub Mariner series III? And a myriad other things that have fallen into my lap over the years? Should I have a clear out and thin the mountain a little?
Or will my childhood come back to haunt me
When I was young, I had a trunk and in that trunk I kept my comics. One day, my Dad said that I should really get rid of some comics if I wanted to get any more - in that way that parents always just allow you to have a prescribed number of things? So my comics went to 'the orphans' - a generic destination for everything I owned it would appear.
What were these gems? Early Bryne and Claremont X-Men. Neal Adams Avengers. Early issues of the Defenders. Comics which I have had to hunt down and pay (in some cases) frankly ridiculous prices for in my adult years.
If I got rid of some of my comics, would I regret it in the future? Would I have to hunt them down again.
Ah buggeration. The problem faced by all hoarders, I believe.
Until I get my head around that little quandry, the comics will remain I guess. And grow. I need to get a load of long boxes however - and spend a day in the loft. Hehe, like I ever have a full day to do anything!
Neil
Monday, November 14, 2005
World of Whoa! Craft
Well, if I'm going to purge my thoughts on my hobbies and where I am being led by them I might as well start with the big one - World of Warcraft.
The question, ladies and gentlemen, is - am I obsessed with WoW or am I obsessed with not being inactive?
I started playing WoW the day that it was given it's EU release. I was persuaded into it by a rather enthusiastic mate who had done the beta and said it was an awesome game. A number of us decided to take the MMORPG plunge that day and well...it has been like an infection. No, a parasite - not necessarily a bad one. Sometimes it's like those birds that clean a hippos teeth! Other times however, it has been like a very long tapeworm eating us from the inside.
We have a guild, the Dungeonners, and we play on the Silvermoon server. We have a regular 'instance' night on Fridays and we all have L60 characters. All sounds great doesn't it? Well, it is. Ish.
The positive sides of WoW have been many - we have had a new common ground to talk about. One of my friends has derived a very interesting PhD out of it. We have been introduced to a number of new friends in the area and indeed, around the world. Friday nights 'in' have become the new Lads Night Out - a testimony maybe to the impact of communications technology on our lives. We have had many many wonderful virtual adventures - laughing and crying together at our triumphs and misfortunes.
However, the negatives have also been many.
One friend has been made a virtual persona non grata by his attitude to the game. A more 'hardcore' player than most, his comments ruffled a number of feathers and we rarely see him. Moreover, it has given rise to almost clandestine suspicions about motive and reason - utterly without evidence.
Another friend has recently left both the guild and our circle of IRL friends because of an ingame promise that was made that, for a simple mistake, could not be kept. This person, whilst not central to our group of friends has been a constant presence for many years. I find that truly sad, especially amongst a group of grown men.
Our discussions about the game have began to push out every other aspect of adult life. Our regular meetings on Wednesdays in the pub used to involve playing cards whilst discussing sport, work, partners, wrestling and a myriad other topics. Now we just talk about WoW - which must be awful for the one person there that doesn't have the game!
Even within those willing participants in the Guild and the game, tensions seem to be rising. One player has radically different views on sharing resources. And I found myself raising my voice and losing my temper. This is the person I consider to be my best friend and I was getting angry with him. Thats just ludicrous!
Interpersonal stuff I can handle, with calm and composure - it's the time issues that are the real problem. WoW is easy. WoW is always there. WoW is rarely troubling or stressful. WoW is a wonderful retreat from a hard day at work. Every day. And therein, it would appear, lies the problem. There are many times that I have had a project to do at home and I will turn on the computer and as my mouse is hovering over the Dreamweaver icon, a voice in my head will say 'just check the AH' - it can't do any harm can it? Four hours later, it's bedtime and no project work has been done. How often does this happen? Often enough for it to be noticeable.
And my wife is convinced that I am addicted. She has a thing about addiction. She calls WoW my 'mistress'. Last weekend I was (not really) watching some sport on the TV and feeling a little down and she suggested that I should play some WoW. To perk myself up! I laughed, she pushed, I laughed and then I tried - and I did feel less shifty.
Now, the question is - was that because I was satisfying some urge to fulfil a chemical imbalance in my brain that WoW stimulates, in the same way as drug usage. Or was it just because I was mind-numbingly bored watching 10-pin bowling?
I HATE being bored. Boredom is my antithesis. Even when I was a kid, my catchphrase was 'I'm BORED!!!!!'. One thing that I have discovered recently is that the mass of TV is boring. I do not like watching TV for the sake of TV but that seems to be the fate of many an adult as they get older. Watching TV. God, thats not going to be my fate!
So, maybe WoW is just my way of escaping TV? That sounds much better than 'I am psychologically addicted to levelling and questing' doesn't it.
So where does that leave WoW in the pantheon of hobbies? Well, it's not going anywhere fast. It's something that I enjoy, that is cheap and that keeps me in the house. Moderation however, would appear to be the watchword and also keeping an eye on the tendency of the game to creep into real life and begin to erode other things.
Whoa to Warcraft, would be the message!
Neil
The question, ladies and gentlemen, is - am I obsessed with WoW or am I obsessed with not being inactive?
I started playing WoW the day that it was given it's EU release. I was persuaded into it by a rather enthusiastic mate who had done the beta and said it was an awesome game. A number of us decided to take the MMORPG plunge that day and well...it has been like an infection. No, a parasite - not necessarily a bad one. Sometimes it's like those birds that clean a hippos teeth! Other times however, it has been like a very long tapeworm eating us from the inside.
We have a guild, the Dungeonners, and we play on the Silvermoon server. We have a regular 'instance' night on Fridays and we all have L60 characters. All sounds great doesn't it? Well, it is. Ish.
The positive sides of WoW have been many - we have had a new common ground to talk about. One of my friends has derived a very interesting PhD out of it. We have been introduced to a number of new friends in the area and indeed, around the world. Friday nights 'in' have become the new Lads Night Out - a testimony maybe to the impact of communications technology on our lives. We have had many many wonderful virtual adventures - laughing and crying together at our triumphs and misfortunes.
However, the negatives have also been many.
One friend has been made a virtual persona non grata by his attitude to the game. A more 'hardcore' player than most, his comments ruffled a number of feathers and we rarely see him. Moreover, it has given rise to almost clandestine suspicions about motive and reason - utterly without evidence.
Another friend has recently left both the guild and our circle of IRL friends because of an ingame promise that was made that, for a simple mistake, could not be kept. This person, whilst not central to our group of friends has been a constant presence for many years. I find that truly sad, especially amongst a group of grown men.
Our discussions about the game have began to push out every other aspect of adult life. Our regular meetings on Wednesdays in the pub used to involve playing cards whilst discussing sport, work, partners, wrestling and a myriad other topics. Now we just talk about WoW - which must be awful for the one person there that doesn't have the game!
Even within those willing participants in the Guild and the game, tensions seem to be rising. One player has radically different views on sharing resources. And I found myself raising my voice and losing my temper. This is the person I consider to be my best friend and I was getting angry with him. Thats just ludicrous!
Interpersonal stuff I can handle, with calm and composure - it's the time issues that are the real problem. WoW is easy. WoW is always there. WoW is rarely troubling or stressful. WoW is a wonderful retreat from a hard day at work. Every day. And therein, it would appear, lies the problem. There are many times that I have had a project to do at home and I will turn on the computer and as my mouse is hovering over the Dreamweaver icon, a voice in my head will say 'just check the AH' - it can't do any harm can it? Four hours later, it's bedtime and no project work has been done. How often does this happen? Often enough for it to be noticeable.
And my wife is convinced that I am addicted. She has a thing about addiction. She calls WoW my 'mistress'. Last weekend I was (not really) watching some sport on the TV and feeling a little down and she suggested that I should play some WoW. To perk myself up! I laughed, she pushed, I laughed and then I tried - and I did feel less shifty.
Now, the question is - was that because I was satisfying some urge to fulfil a chemical imbalance in my brain that WoW stimulates, in the same way as drug usage. Or was it just because I was mind-numbingly bored watching 10-pin bowling?
I HATE being bored. Boredom is my antithesis. Even when I was a kid, my catchphrase was 'I'm BORED!!!!!'. One thing that I have discovered recently is that the mass of TV is boring. I do not like watching TV for the sake of TV but that seems to be the fate of many an adult as they get older. Watching TV. God, thats not going to be my fate!
So, maybe WoW is just my way of escaping TV? That sounds much better than 'I am psychologically addicted to levelling and questing' doesn't it.
So where does that leave WoW in the pantheon of hobbies? Well, it's not going anywhere fast. It's something that I enjoy, that is cheap and that keeps me in the house. Moderation however, would appear to be the watchword and also keeping an eye on the tendency of the game to creep into real life and begin to erode other things.
Whoa to Warcraft, would be the message!
Neil
Getting Started
I never ever thought that I would stoop to writing one of these Godforsaken blog things. And I bet thats the way that a 1001 of these damned symptons of a modern age have started. Sad isn't it? And why was I certain? Well...
(a) - I've never been a one for diaries. They always tended to last three days and then disappear as something more exciting came along.
(b) - I've always been very sceptical about the use of blogs and what you can actually say in them. There is a voyeuristic/exhibitionist angle to them thats quite vain really. You want to say things that are deep and personal...and you want people to be able to read them. But what if the things you are talking about are so personal that you don't want SOME people to read them? And what if they do? And if you cannot say what you think then whats the point. Gah!
So, whats the point then?
Well, I think it will be interesting to track a small portion of my life and the way that it is panning out with regard to hobbies and interests and the media and all manner of things. I have the feeling that the next 6 months will be a watershed for me, one way or another. I can feel change coming on - quite radical change. How it will pan out I have no idea.
So where are we starting from?
Well, I have hobbies - a lot of hobbies. More hobbies than you can shake a stick at. Some are lying fallow and others are taking over to obsessive levels maybe. A shakedown is almost certainly in order.
What are these hobbies? Well here goes.
1. World of Warcraft - I play WoW a lot, almost everyday.
2. Reading comics - My name is Neil and I am a team comic addict
3. Writing fanfic - oh please, delude yourself that you still write.
4. Playing the Raw Deal CCG - not just playing it - I'm the official webmaster, the UK commissioner, a playtester and run a UK website!
5. Watching professional wrestling - well, when I can
6. Cooking - I love cooking!
7. Roleplaying - oh God, yes, I nearly forgot. I roleplay too!
I also have a wife and two kids, a full time managerial job, a consultant media job and a few friends websites that I keep an eye on for them.
Busy? Moi?
So, on the hobby front, here is the current state of play
World of Warcraft - very active, borderline obsession if you believe some.
Reading comics - same as it ever was. Buy and read a few every week
Writing fanfic - this really is a delusion. I stopped this ages ago as it was too time consuming
Playing the Raw Deal CCG - haven't flopped a card for a few months, but still very attached to the game. Having a strange relationship at the moment
Watching professional wrestling - well, when I can, which is a sometimes affair.
Cooking - I love cooking but I rarely have the time or the space to do it as I like
Roleplaying - After months of rather silly soul searching we are about to start playing Buffy again. And I am the referee.
(a) - I've never been a one for diaries. They always tended to last three days and then disappear as something more exciting came along.
(b) - I've always been very sceptical about the use of blogs and what you can actually say in them. There is a voyeuristic/exhibitionist angle to them thats quite vain really. You want to say things that are deep and personal...and you want people to be able to read them. But what if the things you are talking about are so personal that you don't want SOME people to read them? And what if they do? And if you cannot say what you think then whats the point. Gah!
So, whats the point then?
Well, I think it will be interesting to track a small portion of my life and the way that it is panning out with regard to hobbies and interests and the media and all manner of things. I have the feeling that the next 6 months will be a watershed for me, one way or another. I can feel change coming on - quite radical change. How it will pan out I have no idea.
So where are we starting from?
Well, I have hobbies - a lot of hobbies. More hobbies than you can shake a stick at. Some are lying fallow and others are taking over to obsessive levels maybe. A shakedown is almost certainly in order.
What are these hobbies? Well here goes.
1. World of Warcraft - I play WoW a lot, almost everyday.
2. Reading comics - My name is Neil and I am a team comic addict
3. Writing fanfic - oh please, delude yourself that you still write.
4. Playing the Raw Deal CCG - not just playing it - I'm the official webmaster, the UK commissioner, a playtester and run a UK website!
5. Watching professional wrestling - well, when I can
6. Cooking - I love cooking!
7. Roleplaying - oh God, yes, I nearly forgot. I roleplay too!
I also have a wife and two kids, a full time managerial job, a consultant media job and a few friends websites that I keep an eye on for them.
Busy? Moi?
So, on the hobby front, here is the current state of play
World of Warcraft - very active, borderline obsession if you believe some.
Reading comics - same as it ever was. Buy and read a few every week
Writing fanfic - this really is a delusion. I stopped this ages ago as it was too time consuming
Playing the Raw Deal CCG - haven't flopped a card for a few months, but still very attached to the game. Having a strange relationship at the moment
Watching professional wrestling - well, when I can, which is a sometimes affair.
Cooking - I love cooking but I rarely have the time or the space to do it as I like
Roleplaying - After months of rather silly soul searching we are about to start playing Buffy again. And I am the referee.
Labels:
Entertainment,
Fan Fiction,
Raw Deal,
Roleplaying,
World of Warcraft
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